Cooking Gert and selling Motorcycles...

Well, down half a pound…big woop.

But…at least I am not seeing 185 on the scale.

I know I know, I need to just weigh once a week and not every stinking morning. Oh well…what’s gonna happen? I’m gonna probably just get mad and stop this train. LOL!

Anywhoo…my garden is doing amazingly well! Picked a HUGE zucchini over the weekend. We named her Gert she was so big. Gert was 14 inches long, 12 inches around and about 2 ½ pounds.

Gert was made into a chocolate zucchini cake last night…well, some of her was made into a zucchini cake last night. The rest of her is cut up in my fridge.

The Toddler helped stir the batter, but then he got bored and trucked off to build his farm. All righty then. It was a tasty concoction…but I need to shred the zucchini better next time. It has a bit of a coconut texture from all the flakes in it.

The motorcycle has finally sold. FINALLY. I am soo happy about this, there are just no words. The thing was bought right before my husband deployed in 2007. I tried to talk him out of it then. But he HAD to have it. So the year he was gone, it sat in storage. Then he gets home, and it sits in the building. And it sits and it sits and it sits some more. He just didn’t have time, like I told him he wouldn’t.

So we have been trying to sell the crazy thing since January! Imagine the number of flakes, scammers and idiots we have gotten from Craigslist, Ebay and Cycle Trader. Now multiply that by 15. There are some IDIOTS in this world.

Our asking price was $6000…easily worth that plus some. We’ve lowered it as the months went along, and sold it for $5500 yesterday. The guy has sent his deposit…that is done. So he just has to pick up!

Had a guy offer $3000…uh no. The he emailed back that he would pay $4000. Still no. Then he wanted more pictures of the bike. I told him that I wasn’t wasting my time..he wasn’t serious to begin with. Stopped that dead.

Had a guy want us to knock $1000 off because he would have to ship it. Uh no. You don’t buy a bra on Victorias Secret’s website, and then tell them to knock $10 off the price because you have to ship it. Doesn’t work that way.

Had a guy email us that he really wanted it, but didn’t have that much money. Really? What am I supposed to do with that? Do you want me to feel bad for you and give it to you. Doesn’t work that way buddy. If you can’t afford the bike, you are not going to be able to afford the insurance, the maintenance, etc. You’re gonna bust your tail in two minutes and be done is what you are going to do.

We had four or five that arranged to come see it, never showed up. Very nice of them. Very very nice.

Then the scammers…that was fun. When an email is written in formal English, it is a scam. No one writes like that when they regularly speak the language. One almost had us fooled. Until the final email came about being out of the country and sending a wire transfer. It was slick…

I’m just sick of the bike sitting there. Tired of seeing it everytime I go into the building for something. Just tired of it. It’s time for her to go to a new home where she will be loved and enjoyed.

Day Two

No changes. I should have lost 20 lbs by now you know!

Of course, not getting up at 430a to go to the gym will have that affect.

I hate doing this...I want my high school body back. I want to be a size 1 (not really) but you know what I mean.

I want to be able to not see a muffin top (or the whole dozen muffin tops) ringing my stomach. I want to be able to buy single digit clothes again. I want to be able to take pictures with my son and not worry how many chins are going to show up at the party!

So...still slogging along at 185. Like the overnight miracle was going to happen.

Day One

Day one

Ok…my tail has to lose 20 pounds. That will put me at 165.

I weighed in at 185 this am. I am a size 14 or a Large.

My goal is to weigh 165 by November 1st.

That is a pound a week.

So here we go…I'm already crabby and not amused at all.

Date Night

One night, every now and again, the husband and I fork out $12 an hour for the only babysitter we trust with monkey man, and go out for a night on the town for a few hours. To make it an even $60, and ease of running through the ATM on the way home, I book her for five hours. We booked her once, for an entire day...we had so much yard work and outside work that needed done, but no one to field the toddler running amuck...so she did. We managed to mulch, stain the deck, stain the swingset, reseed the yard, mow, weed eat and get things done! It was nice!

Last night we had JessJess from 5-10p...but we had no idea what we were going to do. We were just going out. And then we got the call.

The husband had to work yesterday since on of his co workers, his wife had the audacity to go into labor. :) I'm very happy for them, and if it had been any other reason that made him go in, I would have been pissed. But nope, the monkey and I went to the farmer's market and then to Bouncy( inflatable indoor playground that we love...not it's really name, just what the kiddo calls it).

He gets home at 430p, and we still had no plans. Go be the only people in the theatre watching Sex and the City 2, or go watch Grown Ups? But we were HUNGRY, and not drive thru hungry. Dinner HUNGRY.

So JessJess arrives while the monkey is still sleeping (lucky duck...she always gets the first hour or so child free for some crazy reason)...

We get in the truck and pull out, still no goal. Seriously, we have five hours, child free, that we are PAYING someone for, and have no goal.

So we start driving.

45 minutes later, we are at one of our favorite restaurants and seated with beers in front of us. Considering I had an empty stomach, and I can't hold my liquor anymore, I had a righteous buzz halfway through the glass. Hysterical! It was the warm fuzzy buzz that makes you want to giggle A LOT. About nothing. So I am sitting there, giggling to myself at the audacity of the fact that I am nearly drnk and cannot drive a car on half of a glass of beer.

Dinner was served, the waitress thought I had lost my marbles when I went into the long spiel about the fact I was buzzed. She clearly thought I was crazy. I switched to water, and was sober before we left...or at least my ears had come un numbed.

Then on to shopping...just browsing basically.

We got to Dicks Sporting Goods first. I cannot help it , but everytime I walk in there, to have dirty thoughts about the name. Especially when there is a pile of guys in there attempting to look cool in some regard. I want to bust out with "You know, you can't buy them here" and then walk away. Just once.

So we blunder this store for what felt like an eternity. Then I spotted swimsuits. I've gained some of my weight back...yes. My old swimsuits are bikinis from my skinny summer, and then a one piece that is nearly as old as my house. I am not a fan of swimwear in general. Really, why can guys get away with trunks when we ladies have tightass lycra on that our butt cheeks are falling out of? Really? I have resorted to a pair of trunks with my bikini top and a tank top over that. It works for now...sorta.

So I try on a few...they are nice. Reebok and Speedo, how can you go wrong?

Well, the names don't change the fact that I am going to have to buy a size 16 suit. It fit, and it fit nicely. But you know what, that was my moment of motivation to NOT be this size next summer. So I didn't buy it, much to my husbands agitation. I'll make do this summer with what I have, and next summer, I will not be chubby.

Then we hit Starbucks...hey I didn't say I was starting RIGHT NOW! Starting Monday morning...no more fast food...no more junk...I can do it. I did it before. I dropped 75 pounds by watching what I ate...I can get 20 off my tail.

We'll see how that goes.

Browse some more, crack some jokes at people and their idea of fashionable attire...buy my husband a VERY expensive pair of Birkenstocks (if it will make him shut up about his feet hurting, I'll pay anything) and then head home.

Arrive home to Eli plopped on the couch with JessJess, watching Sesame Street videos. He yells "Nooooo...go back!" LOL! He does everytime. The first time I was a little hurt, now I just know he is having a REALLY good time with his most favorite babysitter ever.

And it's hot outside...stupid hot. Like 103 degrees hot. Off to Bouncy again today...can't stand this heat! Blach!

Daddy is home!

Wow...he's home a week early! So Happy Father's Day to us!

They got finished a little early, so the guys get today as leave, and report back tomorrow. So the Toddler got to do the neat run up the driveway and meet Daddy yesterday afternoon when he pulled in. I had been telling him that Daddy would be home when we got home from taking my mom to meet my dad (she had been staying for two weeks while The Husband was gone). But Paul got stuck in the infamous DC traffic and we beat him back home.

It was so adorable to see him streaking up the driveway...blonde hair flying, yelling 'DADDY!' at the top of this lungs. He's really missed him this trip. He's just been gone so much this summer.

Since we had the pool out (a three ring blow up)...kiddo wanted Daddy to get in. Daddy obliged, clothes and all. Now, that's my husband!

All in all, good evening. Dinner out at a local place we've never tried before, but will be back! Pleasure Island Seafood in Colonial Heights VA. GOOD food. there are no windows in the place, which was strange. But the food was excellent and the service good. We'll be back!

But one thing of note...in all of our travels I have really become aware of a national crisis...and especially since potty training the monkey child... gas station bathrooms are apparently so far down the list of things to do for the folks that work there, it can get pretty scary. NASTY. SCARY. YUCK people! This is coming from a woman who peed in the men's room at a stop in Belize because I was tired of waiting in the line at the ladies' room.

That's a whole other national crisis...Puhlease women...what are you doing in there? Get in , drop trou, pee, swipe, pull up trou. I hear nose blowing, toilet paper being spun off that roll, covering of the seat (hover sweetie...lets go!). You need to go...GO! You are not doing your toilette...you are PEEING! PEE and GET OFF the POT! OMG.

Anyway, I digress.

But before I could let the Toddler go to sleep in the backseat on the way home, I had to pee. You can't leave your sleeping kid in a running vehicle while you go in to pee, no matter how dire, I still had a couple of hours to go, so I had to stop at this dive of an Exxon station somewhere between Appomattox Va and Farmville VA. I think it was Pamplin, VA, I have no bloody clue. I just needed to pee, and I had a toddler dozing off HARD in the back seat, who probably needed to potty too.

I go in, expecting YUCK, but was pleasantly surprised. Friendly cashier, CLEAN bathroom, nice store. Folks...if I am blogging about it, it impressed me. To the point I thanked the clerk.

So if you are down that way, US Route 460, drop on in...not scary at all.

Tell em the lady with the toddler wanting a sucker blogged about it. They might remember me.

Summer time stuff

Ok, the husband is military.

He’s gone A LOT.

This summer almost feels like a deployment, he’s been gone so much. Two weeks here, one week there, three weeks somewhere else, another weekend gone, another week…on and on. His schedule has him away to the point that I just quit trying to remember when he was going to be home. I’ll catch up with him sometime in September is my guess.

Before, I’d find all kinds of things to do when he was gone. I’d take trips by myself, go to the movies by myself, just whatever. If I wanted to sleep on the couch that night in front of the TV, I did. One weekend I decided to paint my bathrooms…so at 3am, I am painting my master bathroom. Yup...3am. And when I got stuck on top of the sink trying to take down the huge mirror, there was no way to get help. My dog was definitely no Lassie. She just looked at me stupid and walked out of the bathroom.

Now, with a Toddler in tow, it’s a little different. We get through.
But the main thing is this, the Toddler misses his Daddy…and that’s rough. He really missed him last night, and I couldn’t get my husband to answer the phone. Cell coverage is spotty where he is at anyway, and he felt bad that he didn’t get to talk to him before bedtime. I felt pretty angry because he didn’t call at bedtime, but he couldn’t leave where he was and call. You just gotta let it roll sometimes.

I’m good at home repairs, I do fine on my own. If I can’t fix it, there is a phone book full of people who can. Dealing with tree removal guys has been entertaining this past week. The estimates to pull down a large oak in my back yard have ranged from $400-$1300. Really? Are you kidding? $1300 to climb a tree and bring it down? I’m not asking for you to hand saw it down…I just need a pro to climb up and bring it down. A bunch of my husband’s buddies and a six pack of beer would result in the tree coming through my house…which is why I called the pros. Wonder which guy I went with. AND, he was the only guy that LISTENED to me when I told him what I wanted. I want the tree down, and the brush chipped. Leave the wood. Pretty simple huh?

I guess all these other guys thought they would just do what they wanted, and one guy argued on the age of the tree and species. It’s an OAK. He called it a MAPLE. Uh, not hiring you if you don’t know the danged difference between and OAK and a MAPLE. Plus, he said the tree was only about nine years old. UH, again. The tree was there, and roughly the same humongo size it is now when we bought the house nine years ago. My guess is FIFTY. OMG. And he gave the highest rate too. Not a fan of being made fun of, or taken advantage of. I’m not an idiot. Female yes, but not an idiot.

So the nice guy, with the small insured company, will be coming out in two weeks to take down that tree. He thinks it was hit by lightning at some point, since the core is dead from the top down, but not the outer branches. I’d believe it. And he answers his phone and returns calls! That’s a plus in my book!

Our water hose really needs thrown away. I think in the back of my mind, I’ve made it my goal to see how many of those little hose repair clamps I can put on it before I get frustrated and throw it in the trash. Right now I am up to three…I think one more will be my limit.

Then there has been the problem with the solicitors this summer…they are making me NUTS! How many of you do I have to say NO too before you stop. Keeping the dog (our 75lb Boxer) outside with me when we are out in the yard has helped. And I have ordered a humongous NO SOLICITING sign to put at the top of the driveway. It’ll look nice next to my new daylillies. Real nice.

Speaking of Daylillies…there is a guy in Richmond, VA that makes it his hobby to grow and create new varieties. Every spring he gets rid of the ones that aren’t ‘perfect’ and starts over a new batch. I managed to score around $500 worth of daylillies for about $60! He’s awesome, and will tell you everything you need to know, and some that you don’t, about daylillies and growing them. He’s very enthusiastic about his creations! And they are so neat!

So I spent Monday night and Tuesday night sweating myself stupid in the flower beds putting these daylillies in. Some are blooming still! I’m so excited. They are going to be gorgeous. I want to go back and buy some more…

Elmo Live...not for the over-thirty crowd

One: We didn’t even know Elmo was in town. I just happened to see an ad on the sidebar of my Facebook Home page and clicked it. Tada! So with two days to go before showtime, we managed to get super good seats. Who knew? The advertising budget must not have been very good this year. Even my son's daycare had no idea the production was in town.

Sent an email to a few friends, one replied back with 'WOW...that's steep!' Really? $20 a ticket is steep? I went to Disney with a toddler...$20 a ticket is a STEAL...but I digress. It's not like we do it every weekend. We would have spent mroe than this hiring a sitter and going to see Sex and the City like we had originally planned, but the sitter couldn't sit this weekend...so we ended up at Elmo Live. Sex and the City versus Elmo Live...by the end...you get popcorn at both and sit in a dark theatre for a few hours. However, the Sex and the City crowd would have been mostly potty trained, I hope. Or at least more bathrooms, but that comes later.

Arrival at the Landmark Theatre in Richmond was easy. Parking garage, $5. Lots of available parking. Strolled over and went inside.

Problem number one: Landmark is an older theatre and apparently in the old days, people had larger bladders. I didn't remember that there is only one set of restrooms. When you are a childless couple attending a Broadway production, potties are not the number one sought out amenitie. This was going to get interesting with the potty training crowd with three stalls in the ladies room. There was already a line, and there were maybe twenty people in the entire theatre at this point.

Problem number two: We arrived early, so we had to mill around the lobby area for twenty minutes or so before we got in to our seats. No big deal. We just milled around away from the Sesame Street stuff for sale. And there wasn't much...thank goodness.

Made our way to our seats and I notice problem number three:

There will be no interaction with the characters at Landmark. The stage is not designed to allow the characters off and into the crowd. So there went that. Oh well. We still had excellent seats. Back row of Section C (center) on the aisle. PERFECT. We can make a mad dash if he flips out.

Show starts! Elmo and friends come out! Kids go nuts. The little girl in front of us proceeds to completely flip out and daddy had to run with her. I didn't see them again the rest of the show.

About twenty minutes in, the crowd is subdued. My husband has dozed off. Looking around, lots of dads have dozed off.

More parents arrive about forty minutes late…dragging their children up and down the aisles, looking for their seats, ushers are trying to herd them along…it’s a mess. Seriously? You just paid $20+ a ticket, and you arrive HALFWAY through the show. Give me a break. It wasn’t just one set, it was MANY sets. Very weird.

Intermission is 45 LOOONG minutes later. So far, Elmo and friends have danced and sang their way all the way around planting a sunflower. I just want them to dig a hole so I can get out of here and go eat lunch!

My son decides to have a melt down moment in the aisle because I won’t go buy him some toy that he saw another kid with. By the time the husband gets back from his snack/caffeine run, he’s all good and back in my lap.

Show starts back up again…only forty five more minutes to go! The husband has now broken out the I-Phone and I catch him surfing Facebook. No fair…I have a toddler on a my lap, I’ve completely zoned out on the show and am now checking out the lighting rigs, the tech board behind me and marveling at some of the architecture in the theatre. It really is a beautiful theatre. I'm also trying to figure out how they are making the mouths on the characters move...it's gotta be remote controlled.

About five minutes in, I could doze off. Kids are starting to lose interest and parents start leaving about half way through the second half. This show could have easily been shortened by thirty minutes. Take out something. Maybe the song and dance number with Oscar the Grouch and his weird girlfriend. Kids are getting crabby, adults are bored.

Grand Finale: FINALLY! The characters sing and dance about planting the sunflower…wish it would have grown magically or something to show it was happy…then the cannons go off and shoot streamers down into the audience. The kids who initially did not freak out over the characters first appearance, have now been traumatized. Not once, but twice…because the cannons go off again.

Out the door and to the right…quickly. Wanting to avoid the BIG Elmo balloons. We almost make it, but the Toddler spots one at the crosswalk to the parking garage and wants to barter his tshirt for it. No can do.

All in all, a good show. If we had more than one kid, I would have reconsidered the amount we paid for the ticket. With TicketMasters prices…we paid $85 total, including all those fancy taxes and fees, for floor seats. We could have paid cheaper in the balcony, but I wasn’t thinking that the characters couldn’t get off of Landmark Theatres stage. I’ll remember that next time...and won't pay for down front seats.

I'll give it a four star for the kids entertainment. Two star for the adults. Two star for facilities in this theatre for the younger crowd. Five star for parking.