About Me

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Married to GI Joe, and the Mother to GI Joe Jr (whom is currently addicted to the Wonderful World of Superheroes), I'm a WV Hillbilly plunked down in a subdivision. I have a backyard garden, crazy neighbors, and a goofy dog that we love on Tuesdays. We love to travel and explore new things, so feel free to browse our life. Sometimes it is exciting, most of the time it is just life. But we are having a good time at it.

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Survival Mode...

Well...it isn't THAT desperate...but we are pretty much camping at our house.

Power went out at 2p on Saturday during that Bitch Irene.
And she roared until 2am..so a total of about 18 hours at my house pacing from window to window to door to window...and repeat.
We are still without power, and since I live in a Rural Area...and the damage there is FIERCE...we are looking to not have power until Friday or so.
And it sucks.
BUT...I didn't have to call the insurance company.
I have my generator.
And we are fine.
I'll update later...with other observations.

(Please note...I am posting from work during my lunch)
But to the local Richmond Media...YOU SUCKED at this.
If I had not been a devout follower of wxrisk.com, I would never ever ever have expected it to be this bad.
And to not bother with on air coverage...that made you YOU SUCK HARDER.
60 minutes of music...AWESOME.
Through a Hurricane.  Exactly what I wanted to hear.
I had no phone, no internet, no power...and my radio was nothing but Music and a freaking NASCAR race.
Oh, and to tell your on air viewers to visit your webpage...HA!  What effing webpage am I supposed to visit ASSHOLE?!   85% of my county is STILL without power.  1.2 million people were without power. Let me jump on my laptop...yup.  DUMBASS.
I would like to have had at least a weather cut in to update the RADAR to let me know how much longer this damned 80 mph wind was going to rock my house...not that effing hard.
SHIT people...I work in MEDIA and thank GOODNESS it is not LOCAL media...cause you all SUCKED.

And to the folks that said it was hyped.
Drive down my way...lets talk HYPE.
Screw you.

Rant done.

Sorta...till I get home and have to rev up the generator again.

Bless my Craftsman generator...courtesy of lessons learned during Isabel.

Friday, August 26, 2011

Things NOT to say....

Here is a list of tips of things NOT to say or bitch about around a friend/family member/co worker with a spouse that is deployed or works out of town a lot.

1)  If your husband leaves and goes on a six week motorcycle trek around the United States...Please do not fucking come into work all snotty and teary eyed.  I put mine on a fucking plane to a War Zone for a year.  Dry it up in the car sister and get a grip before you stroll in here.  I am going to roll my eyes at you.  And did.  When I turned around to head back to my desk.

2)  If your husband is going to be out of town for the weekend due to a work trip, please do not flip out at work about how you are going to go nuts with the kids by yourself all weekend without his help.  Oh. My. God.  Really?  Really?  Just keep that to yourself because I am passing serious judgment on your ass over here.

3)  Don't snurl your nose at the friend/family member/ co worker and make a smart ass remark about vacation time.  Sister, all I said was 'you don't have to worry about me taking a week of vacation for a while....Haha! '  I didn't pee on your parade and you didn't need to smart back 'you've already had your vacation it's time for mine'   Get over yourself.  It wasn't the vacation we had planned for the year.  The rug got yanked out from under us.  I was joking with you and laughing at the fact that I am kind of planted in one place for a while.  Geez. 

4)  Oh give me a break.  You can't sleep when your husband isn't home.  Please.  I get it.  But please don't go on and on and on about how lonely you are, and scared, and nervous.  Blah blah blah.  I'll trade ya.

5)  Remember that the friend/family member/ co worker is ALONE.  A.L.O.N.E  Yes, I am going to stress a little bit over stuff that seems to be mundane.  You have a support system and someone else in the house that can help fill in the gaps.  My little support system can't get his own juice yet.  I literally have one set of hands and four jobs to do with them.

Vent done..I'm just bitter.  Bitter Bitter Bitter.

Thursday, August 25, 2011

Waiting on the locusts...

The Great Virginia Earthquake rattled us on Tuesday afternoon.

I was in the grocery store, in the Natural Foods aisle, when all the ultra expensive jars of all natural fruit juice started rattling.  Hmmmmmm.....Strange...

I looked upwards and watched the lights swing and the air conditioning ducts shake...

Double hmmmmmm....

Slowly, I backed down the aisle to a more open space and we all waited for it to end...

It just kept going and going and going and going...

Finally, the last tremble stopped and we all kind of looked at each other and laughed.

The rest of the day, I can honestly say we got very little done.  With the number of phone calls, Facebook hits, emails...everyone wanted to know if we were OK.

Kiddo announced at pickup that 'The ewrfquake woke me up Mommy!' in a very indignant tone of voice.  He was more upset over his interrupted nap than anything.

That's my kid...cool as a cucumber.

And then news of Irene...

Massive Ass Hurricane barreling towards the East Coast.

I survived Isabel and I am scarred.

I grew up with snow storms.

Not raging wind rain lashing trees bending over to the ground stuff flying everywhere storms.

So I started my preparations early because I am a devout follower of wxrisk.com

He is a Meterological God...if there is such a thing.

He's not the on air weather guy at the local affiliates that have missed nearly every significant weather event for the past five years.

He's dead on.

And he called this storm earlier this week.

It wasn't going to swing northeast and hammer out New York.

It was going to come inland as a Strong Categorty 3 or a Category 4 in Wilmington NC, and take out Virginia Beach, Norfolk, and Central VA, then barrel on up the East Coast.  New York is dessert. 

We are the entree.

wxrisk.com called this on MONDAY.

Our local affiliates and The Weather Channel are just now catching up, today...THURSDAY.


People are having to evacuate,...and I am talking about LOTS of people.

Stupid state government waited a bit too long.  Just sayin'.

And half of our Virginia National Guard members are currently about ten time zones east.

So we wait on Irene.

I have my propane.

And my generator is tested and ready.

I have replenished my Storm Box and am loaded with batteries, flashlights, lanterns and a battery operated radio.

Fridge has lots of bottled water, juice, sweet tea.

Cereal, rice milk, Chef Boy Ar Dee in the cabinet.

Doritos, Potato Chips, Dip...cookies...and I'll bake a cake tomorrow.

Some boxes of Little Debbie snack cakes.

Baked spaghetti and a chicken casserole will be baked tomorrow night...and we are set.

I'm scared.

Isabel it was just me and The Husband.

This time is it me and Kiddo.

I'm responsible for him and keeping him safe and calm.

I'm eyeballing our tall oak trees and trying to gauge which way they might go.

I have never seen devastation like Isabel.  She was a terrible storm to the Central Virginia area. 

She tore trees up by their roots and flung buildings around like they were nothing.

After Isabel blew through, I drove out to see if I could find gas (yeah right)

I saw a family sitting out in their yard around the picnic table, with their heads bowed in prayer and holding hands while saying Grace...as a massive oak tree literally laid across their house and had cut it in half.  I pass that house once a week or so...and the scar of the different colored shingles serves as a big reminder of the punch of these storms. 

I couldn't help but honk and wave at the power crew convoys heading east as I was heading home tonight.

This is gonna be an interesting weekend!

Sunday, August 14, 2011

Single Parenting

I know I know I KNOW...I am technically NOT a single parent.

But for a year, I get to be Mom, Dad, Disciplinarian, Playmate, Manager, Chauffer, etc...all by myself...with no helping hands.

And I get to hang out By Myself at the Baby Pool when I go with friends today.

Yeah...that was fun.

My BFF is in town from Maine...you know the State that she fled to and abandoned me a few years ago.

I am not holding a grudge or anything.

She came in for the weekend and made her rounds between friends and family.

A potluck/pool party was held on Saturday night at one of her close Teacher Friends' house...and we ate hot crab dip, (I made pepperoni rolls which will have a blog all their own in a few days)...and brownies. 

The kids played in the pool.  Well, mine ran around the edges waving a Pool Noodle and pretending it was an Elephant Trunk.

Sunday was another excursion...to the Teacher Friend's Pool Club.

And it rained all freaking morning.

So we waited it out.

When the sun finally appeared...and we journeyed to the Pool...I knew I was kind of up the creek.

I have the youngest child in the gaggle of kids.  LIke YOUNGEST YOUNGEST by 8 or 9 years at least.  So no one even CLOSE.

BFF likes laying out in the sun and just chatting.

Teacher Friend's all like to lay out in the sun and chat.

And their kids are ALL older.  And in the Pool.  By themselves.

So I spent the better part of my day, sitting at the Baby Pool with the stupid water cannon toy and putting out the 'fires'...otherwise known to Non-Kiddos as Fountains.

Yup.  Fun times.

I mean...I love playing with my kid...but I kept looking longingly over at the lounging Teachers and wanting to go chat...and just hang out.

But no.  I had to be the Responsible Mommy and play with my kid.

I know it sounds like I was miserable...I guess I was more lonely than anything.

If The Husband had been home, we would have had a Girls weekend. 

Since I can't get a Freaking Babysitter to show up for an Interview, then that was out of the question anyway.

I'm just irritated I guess.

They offered to move their stuff over to the Baby Pool with me but I did say No.


Because there were no lounge chairs there...just tables and chairs.

The Kiddo was squirting everything in a ten foot range with the stupid water cannon that will find its fate after bedtime.  I didn't want to make them sit through that...

And really...Spending time with him was Fun.

He told me I was 'The Bestest Ever'...until I tricked him into the Big Pool and I was 'Not the Bestest Anymore Mom!'   Once he figured out it was fun, I was 'Bestest Ever' again.

But I'm sick of the Baby Pool.

Thursday, August 11, 2011


I've spent the evening, doing a little bit of throwing my voice around.


I bribed one of the Production Guys that I work with to give me a CD of about a dozen of my most recent Voice Overs for our Station Group.

And I've spent the last few hours uploading them to various agencies in the area.

Maybe I will get a few pieces of work.

More than likely I won't.

But I can sling it against the wall and see if it sticks.

Any dough I make while DH is gone, and while I am in school...I am stashing it in the 'Welcome Home Honey Vacation Fund'. 

We won't get much of a vacation if we take it right when he gets back since I will still be in classes, but every drop helps towards the Disney trip I want to take before Kiddo starts Kindergarten in 2013.  Or a nice week at the Beach once I Graduate and before I start working.  Hoping I can work that out with my New Employer.  Whomever that may be.

I've also applied to substitute at his Preschool during my down time.  Especially around Christmas when I am out of class for nearly a month.

Now, I have officially lost my ever loving mind. 

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Wednesday Ramblings...

Todays ramblings…

1)  If you fail a drug test once at potential employer…and KNOW you are going to fail a retest…why do a retest?  Really.  Just walk away.  It’s a waste of time, and we are going to roll our eyes.  Guarandamnteed.  Why we allowed you a retest is beyond me, had to do with something from the lab saying they needed more info…but come on!

2)  Attempting to justify a fancy schmancy daycare/preschool on a budget that is potentially going to be a Single Income Budget next year is NOT justifiable.  No amount of figuring and refiguring and readjusting is going to create the magic number that you need.  Let it go and stick with the daycare/preschool that fits your budget for crying out loud.  He will be FINE.

3)  It is the UPS truck that keeps leaving oil stains in my driveway.  Received another delivery yesterday from Amazon (The Husband is ordering stuff and some cannot be shipped directly so I have to ship it for him) and there is a brand new stain in my driveway.   Urgh.  At least I have let go of the obsession about my car leaking the oil.

4)  Why a library has FOUR drop off bins, at their door, and none curbside is beyond me.  Yes, I know that walking is good for you…but the parking lot is a good distance from the building, and then add the elevated ramp to the door is an even LONGER walk.  In 115 degree summer heat…yes, my books are overdue.  They will be until the heat breaks. Probably tomorrow.  Thanks!

5)  I lost my mind and Friended my Mom on Facebook.  I am hoping that the newness wears off soon, or that she gets paranoid about who is watching her computer use and shuts her internet down for the thirtieth time.  This is getting old.  She keeps writing crap all over my wall…and has gotten into the ‘cut and paste’ status crap games.  Give me strength.

6)  Kiddo informed his daycare teacher, first thing this morning, that I threw away his dinner last night and he cried.  Yes, I sank into the floor and attempted to crawl under a table.   Sweet.   For the record: I threw away the CRUST of his grilled cheese sandwich.  He was DONE.  Away from the table and PLAYING!  HELLO!   And yes, he cried.  He threw an epic fit and tried to dig them out of the trash.  Awesome moment.  I win the ‘Worst Mommy in Kiddo’s Eyes’ Award.

7)  I am really going to miss my Housekeeper when The Husband gets back next year and the Budget Crunch begins.  I really am.  She’s awesome and amazing.  And I am going to have to scrub my own bathtub again. 

8)  I wish The Husband would consistently call at the same time every day.  I wait until he calls before I go to lunch.  I know he is busy, and working long hours, but I’m HUNGRY.  RIGHT NOW!   And I want to leave.   So I end up in the car, or in the middle of Target trying to hold the cell signal long enough to talk to him.  I know I have received a number of dirty looks because my phone kept ringing because the call kept dropping.  Oh well…they can just look.  They probably get to go home to Their Husband at night.

9)  Kiddo is Kiddo.  He’s making me insane with the inability to hear my voice.  I’m beginning to feel like the teacher on Peanuts.  ‘Wah Wah Wah Wahh Wah’

10)  Kiddo’s Fourth Birthday party is becoming quite a flop.  So far, I’ve sent out invitations to 12 kids.  So far, I have two RSVP’s.  Really?  The party is next weekend, so I will get the wave of RSVP’s on Friday.  After I gave them the date of Aug 10th to RSVP by.  Ridiculous.  People…you know whether you are coming or not.  PLEASE LET ME KNOW.  I have to give a list to the coordinator at the site.  Duh.

11)  Conversations with The Husband can be best described as Mundane As Hell.  He can’t talk about what he is doing at work.  My job is the same old same old.   Kiddo doesn’t want to talk to him 90% of the time.  There is nothing to talk about!  Nothing!  Plus, he shares a room with another soldier, so we can’t even have ‘private’ conversations.  Blah.  Blah. Blah.  I am very glad I get to talk to him…please don’t get me wrong.  It’s just AWFUL.  Lots of long silences.  Most of the time I look like ASS because I’m getting ready for bed when he Skypes in.  *sigh*  There is only so much you can talk about.  The weather (It’s Hot…It’s Hot Here too).  The Kiddo (he’s wild…yeah I see that).  The Dog (he’s laying down).  The House (everything is fine).  The Job( Same old same old). 

12) The No Caffeine thing is working out pretty well.   One of my Co Workers acted as my Mule and brought back 7 six packs of 16 oz bottles of Caffeine Free Diet Mtn Dew (not available to purchase in the states of VA nor WV) from North Carolina when he visited a few weeks ago.  The Decaf Coffee isn’t too bad.  And I am coping just fine.  Ice Water when I eat out…and one Caffeinated beverage a day and all is well.  My Mammary Mashing is scheduled for the middle of September.  We’ll see how it goes.  Wish me luck!

Monday, August 8, 2011

Over the River and Through the Woods...

To Nana and Papaw's we go!

After about six gazillion potty breaks...and thank you Virginia for a lovely rest stop on I81 near Wytheville VA.  I turned him loose in that field for twenty minutes and it was exactly what he needed!  Wonder how many kiddos have climbed those rocks?

We rolled across the State Line with the horn honking and 'Whoooo hooooing!' as we screamed down East River Mountain on I77N.   Well, I was 'Whoooo hoooing!'  Kiddo was ignoring me and watching out the window.    He'd had about enough of me.

I didn't care.  I love driving down that mountain. 

Mucho excitement when we finally got to my Parents.  I had gotten run off the road by a yoohoo trying to pass on a double line on windy river road...awesome.   Nothing says Welcome Home like diving for the ditch.

Friday night was the County Fair...much fun was had in the Bounce Houses and blundering the venders...but the main draw was the Rodeo for my Kiddo...

I had been promising the Rodeo for weeks, and the weather held nicely!  Next time we will take our own chairs.  I think we said that last time...but bleachers are a pain in the tookus to my Dad...literally.  And it was PACKED.  For a little community, this was something different to do on Friday night.  And it was FUN.

Funnel cake and a spilled $5 sweet tea later, Kiddo and I were covered in powdered sugar with sticky fingers and sticky shoes from the tea. 

Maybe next year, Kiddo will get to participate in the games.  He had to run out of the arena for an emergency potty break.

Ever took a nearly four year old to a porta potty in the dark?  Awesome.  You should try it some time.

Saturday found us at the Fishing Hole.  Fishing is a BIG DEAL to my Dad.  Come hail, rain, lightning, thunder...ice...whatever...he's out there on the creek bank.  He does catfish tournaments...(if you are not familiar...a bunch of people draw numbers for a spot around a catfish pond, and you sit all evening and into the night to see who can catch the biggest catfish.  You aggravate each other...you find the stinkiest concoction of bait that you can possibly find...and it's fun).  I've spent a lot of nights asleep in a folding chair on the bank...I can't stay up all night.  My attention wears off about an hour in. 

He Bass fishes.

He boat fishes.

Whatever it takes to catch fish.

It was time for my child to go fishing with Pawpaw. 

And his attention wore off about five minutes in. 

He couldn't see the fish.

He didn't want any one casting his line. 

By the way, his pole was a REAL pole.  My Dad refuses to buy him a kiddie pole.  It was a REAL pole.  So he had about six feet of swinging fishing pole that he was using as a jousting stick.

I had to take it away .

Which resulted in an Epic Pout.

And we fished....and fished...and fished.

Kiddo ate goldfish...and whined...and whined...and got in the weeds. 

I broke out with poison ivy this morning from THAT excursion.

I was ready to pack it all up...when Dad let him reel the first one in....

NOW Kiddo was interested!

Five fish later we had to run for the car due to a thunderstorm...but we caught fish!

Saturday night was dinner out a local new BBQ restaurant.  Quite tasty.  If you ever in Pipestem, WV...look up Brandon's. 

And then the traditional journey to Pipestem State Park.

West Virginia knows how to do State Parks.

Virginia does not.

My Dad helped build Pipestem...and he will check out his concrete work nearly every time.   It's still there of course.  My Dad does good work!

Of course we had to take in the Overlook...can't leave without that...

I miss the Mountains...there's no where else like it.

And my accent is THICK this week.  

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