Found IT...small problem

We found our Forever House...however, there is are a few small problems.

One...our in no way shape form or fashion is ready to be listed.  Right now, it looks like the train section of Toys R Us threw up everywhere in our living room.  There is just STUFF everywhere.

The Husband and I spent the entire morning yesterday morning ripping out our Master Bedroom closet.  OMG.  Two people should never acquire that much CRAP...EVER.  Why we were hanging on to half that mess is beyond me.  So off to Goodwill The Husband went with a pile of CRAP.

Linen closet in the Bathroom is my project this evening after The Toddler wakes from his nap...he is currently passed out in our big bed.  Not moving that for all the tea in China.

However, back to the topic.

Our requirements for our new home are a few simple things:

1--I do not want to see one freaking single junked car on the street.  Anywhere.  Not in a back yard, side yard,  on the street, under a carport...no where.  Because those suckers freaking multiply and grow ragged blue tarps over them that deteriorate at a rapid rate into waving flags of depressed blue strings.

2--I do not want to see one single pack of teenagers hanging out in someone's driveway having a good time on Sunday afternoon.  Because THOSE suckers freaking multiply into a pack of teenagers wandering the street and ringing my effing doorbell at midnight on a Wednesday to leave a broke down bicycle on my front porch.  Uh huh.

3--I do not want to see one single lawn that looks as if it is ready to be mown for hay.  Because that sucker will never get mown.  EVER.  I will have to drag my $99 Wal Mart push mower over there on a Saturday afternoon and mow it because I can no longer see my neighbors heat pump above the waving fields of grain.

4--We want a good school system.  Ours currently SUUUUUCKS eggs.  We didn't think of that nine and a half years ago when we were childless and just fine with that.

5--We do not ever ever ever ever ever ever want an open floor plan...ever again.  Yes, its fun to hang out together.  Uh huh.

6--Nice big backyard.  Which we have already.  That's given.  If I could take my backyard with me.  I would.

7--I want real pavement on my street.  Not tar and gravel wanna be pavement.

8--Central air.  Can't live without it here.  Well, you can, but you'd live at Target all day.

Well...after those requirements are narrowed down, and we saw all the Broken Houses last weekend....we were disgruntled to say the least.  So we did a tour today through a neighborhood that we are currently stalking the holy hell out of.

We stopped at two houses and walked around and deemed them 'ok'.  One need some exterior work, but the interior looked great.  The other was priced waaaay out of what it was and where it was.

Then, at the back part of the neighborhood, we found IT.

The Toddler was asleep at that point, so we took turns.  I feel in love.

Its a two story colonial.  On a quiet street.  No trash next door.  No trash across the street.  No vagrant teenagers.   No junk cars.

It just shone like a beacon at the end of the street.   A cream colored beacon that had been well taken care.  And the neighbors had landscaped their property.  And there was a privacy fence.  And a workshop built on.  And and and and and....

But it is 'Rent to Own'.  What the hell?

Buuuuut...after a lot of Googling...I found IT..

It's in our price range.  It's there...and clean...and available...and not Broken.

But our house is nowhere near ready.

So we are cancelling our vacation in May, and taking a week off in February to get this house ready and rolling.

And I am pestering the crap out of my realtor to see if IT is even feasible to consider.

I need to pack.